Finding someone to care for your child when you go back to work is eerily like dating -- the word-of-mouth recommendations, the chatting via e-mail before you meet, the nerves before the first get-together ... It's enough to make you want to hide in the corner and swear you're never going to go out again.

I encountered this scenario last summer. Ten weeks after I had my son, I decided it probably was about time I found some child care for when I went back to work. I weighed all the different options available. Day care, relatives, friends, neighbors -- a nanny seemed best suited to my family's lifestyle.

So we decided to jump into the game of nanny-finding, hopeful of finding our perfect match but realistic about our prospects. I wondered how long it takes to find a nanny and how one actually goes about finding one. I was surprised to find that people stumble upon their nannies -- like their boyfriends -- just about everywhere.

"A friend of a friend of a friend's sister set me up with my nanny," one friend claimed.
"I heard of a great Web site you should join," said another.

I couldn't believe it. Nannies were in abundance! It was so much easier than dating.

I created a roster of potential suitors mainly via word-of-mouth. Before paying big bucks for an agency or going online, I wanted to see if I could drum up some action by finding someone who knew someone.

Selecting a location for our first encounter took some planning. I needed neutral territory that was convenient for us both and would be a perfect setting for our first date. We decided to meet at a coffee shop, of course. Over a latte and muffins, we could get to know each other in a comfortable setting. And if I didn't like the potential candidate, I could feign a really bad stomach ache and run home.

Not that I've ever done that on a date ...

So I went to the coffee shop and awaited my nannies. I really didn't prepare; How hard could it be? Clearly, I forgot what it's like to date.

The thing about finding a nanny is that as much as you might like a prospect, she has to like you and your family, too. Nanny love can't just be a one-way street. And for all you know, she has many other potential matches out there, as well. I think I answered more questions than they did, and after meeting with several candidates over several days I was overly caffeinated and no closer to finding the new love of my life. I was distraught and fraught with angst.

This was so much worse than dating! There is no time limit on when you have to find a boyfriend -- according to some -- but the day I had to go back to work was rapidly approaching, and I was still single.

"I can come for a few days, honey," my mother assured me. But the thing is, when you leave your child for the first time for more than an hour, you want to leave him with someone who isn't afraid of commitment and can stick with you through the good and the bad. He was only 3½ months old, but I felt he needed consistency, not some short-lived fling.

I then did what I swore I'd never do -- I went online to find my nanny match. It's easy to tell your friends to try online dating, but until you put yourself out there on the Internet, you don't know how scary it can be.

There are many choices for online nanny-dating. And the sites make it sound so easy. "We can find you a nanny fast! We are accredited! Money back, guaranteed!"

These options all seemed a little daunting, not to mention expensive. So I decided to dip my toes the easiest way I could think of: I posted on Craigslist.

I created what I thought was a reasonable advertisement and pushed it live. Then I waited for some responses. Within the course of two days I had over 25 nannies to choose from. "I must look very attractive online," I thought.

I narrowed my list to three viable paramours. This time I was prepared for the coffee dates. I came armed with questions and even a pen and paper. I would not be fooled again.

The first two candidates I met with were perfectly acceptable, but I didn't feel that connection you look for in your soul mate. I felt nervous and annoyed. Where was my nanny in shining armor? Why was this taking so long?

And then she walked through the door, smile on her face, bundled in a red coat. I knew right away this was the one. After a half-an-hour chat, I was ready to take the next step in our relationship -- inviting her back to my house to meet my family.

An hour with my son and husband and the deal was sealed.

It was a trying and exasperating process, but in the end, I'm glad I was patient -- I think I found my perfect match.

Sara R. Fisher is a new mom trying to look hip, work hard and raise a child -- all at the same time. Her column appears every other Thursday. You can read more from her at her blog, Self-Made Mom.